So many things about my fourth pregnancy were different.
For the first time, I would be giving birth in the fall, not the summer. This made me nervous. What would I do if I couldn’t bring my screaming baby outside for a walk in nice, warm weather? (I always have screaming babies.)
For the first time, I craved cheese. Slices of cheese, melty cheese, gooey cheese, cheese crumbles, cream cheese. The form didn’t really matter.
For the first time, I had evening sickness, which was really just gross, burpy nausea each evening. (Could it have had something to do with the cheese?…)
For the first time, I would be bringing a baby into the world in a different town. This was because we were living with my parents, which also meant that…
For the first time, I’d have my mom with me for the whole pregnancy, birth, and newborn time. My mom is amazing. Having her support through those tough early weeks of pregnancy kept our home from becoming the nightmare it had become during each of the other first trimesters. And knowing she wouldn’t have to drive an hour-and-a-half to try to make it to the birth was a great relief. On top of that, I’d have another set of arms eager hold the baby anytime I needed a break. Just a few extra reasons to rejoice that our family was living together.
BUT… for the time, I had a flash of worry that I might end up giving birth without my husband, mom, or midwife here to support me. It was somewhere mid-pregnancy when it occurred to me that I could very well go into labor when Erich was in Knoxville (an hour and a half away), when my mom was at work (40 minutes away), and when my midwife (who lived only 20 minutes away) happened to be somewhere further away. Last time I had only 20 minutes from the first “real” contraction to the time I held my baby girl in my arms. I assumed this time wouldn’t give too much additional warning. Thankfully, I have a sovereign and trustworthy God. When I placed my worry in His hands, trusting Him to bring the baby forth in His perfect time, I was able to rest knowing that whoever was supposed to be here would be here. On top of it, Madeline was excited about the prospect of assisting me through it all by herself. Given how mature and capable she is, I knew she would do a wonderful job! (Details on the actual birth are coming next…)
What remained unchanged this pregnancy was the miracle of it all. Even though this was our fourth pregnancy, none of the joy or wonder was diminished. The growing belly was just as exciting. The movements were just as exhilarating. Hearing the baby’s heartbeat was just as awe-inspiring.
And having three older kids to share in it all was super-fun!